I am a Somatic Trauma Therapist, but how did I get here?

I’ll start with a brief introduction about myself…

Hi, I’m Nikki, also known as Nik, or Nicola depending on where you know me from. Nik is because I was literally too lazy to sign off my full name when I was writing text to my Somatic clients, So it stuck. Take from that about my personality what you will, I have more important work to do on this earth than the taking the extra time it takes to finish off my full name. You maybe found my page as you have heard the word ‘Somatic’ being thrown around everywhere but not got a fucking clue what it means so you googled it? You maybe found my page because you were a hair client of mine and wanted to follow what I speak about constantly in appointments? Or you found my page because you are maybe in a rabbit hole on the internet at 3am trying to find why you have been to talk therapies for years but you are still going over the same stuff and feel you are getting no where so you’ve went on a hyperfocus deep dive and ended up here? The latter would be me, if its is you also, I see you. Now lets get into how I went from a Hairstylist to a Somatic Trauma Therapist, to some it may seem wildly different careers, to anyone who has sat in the hairdressers chair and left it feeling 100x better because you have had a holistic experience of touch and felt listened too without feeling judged then you probably dont think its such a wild jump? Am I right? In advance I apologise for my bad grammar and swearing, on second thoughts I dont…Its a part of what makes me me. Intelligence comes in so many forms so why is academic the only one that is celebrated? But that convo is for another time…Here is my story.

I’ll begin in 2017. I’m hair stylist of 17 years and as much as I love my job I feel I want to do something to get my brain going again and help people in a different way…Is what I told myself. Realistically, In hindsight, I was fresh out of an abusive relationship and needed support to heal. Projection is a funny thing let me tell you. I thought to myself, I still want to make people feel good, help them relax and feel held but with ZERO chat…yes hairdressers get ABSOLUTELY BURNT OUT WITH THE CHAT! You heard it here first. What could I do? People focused, relaxing, feeling held…Massage! But as with everything I do, perfectionist in rehab here, I wanted to make sure I done it to the best of my abilities. This is when I started searching for massage courses. I came across The holistic school of therapy and amazingly the course was in Edinburgh, even better in Leith where I lived. I am the sort of person who believes in alignment, if you know to look for the signs the path is always clear. This course was a holistic massage course and being a “holistic gal” I thought perfect. I put “holistic gal” in finger quotes because fuck me I did not know what it meant to be holistic until 7 years later when I delved into Somatic Trauma Therapy, Trust me its a fucking wild but amazing ride. The course was a year long, with it you done Anatomy, Physiology and Pathology Level 4, which appealed to my total nerd side of needing to know everything too, Biology was a dream for me in school. Even better was the course was accredited by a world wide provider, meaning it was recognised internationally, which appealed to the traveller blood in me. The interview was had and I was welcomed onto the course. Now the fun begins.

“I can teach you massage over a weekend, but this course is more than that and what this type of course attracts is usually people who need to heal their self. I need the year to make sure you are all in a place that you can hold space for people but are ok yourselves. Holistic massage is more than rubbing the body in a routine, It treats the body as a whole, meaning it takes into consideration peoples physical body, emotional body and energetic body. Thats why I make it a year long course” - Simonetta Logan, A Trauma therapist of 30 years and the founder of School of Holistic Therapy

Day 1 of my course. I nearly cried. This one sentance touched my soul and started me out on what I now practice as a career. To say I was excited was an understatement but fuck me I did not know what the next year would unravel in me as a person. If I was to speak back to myself then it would probably go something like this… “Little do you know but this is the first day of what is going to be the rest of your lifes work, its gonna be a tough fucking ride and there are going to be ups and downs but if you could see yourself in 8 years time and feel the difference in you as a person you wouldn’t recognise yourself. You dont drink. You dont chase men for validation and put up with fucking abuse and nonsense in relationships, you have accepted and are leaning into your queer joy. You enjoy alone time. You own a business. You are moving back to Australia. You have nothing and never did have anything to prove and you realise that now. You are so fucking happy and accepting of with who you are, I dont think you understand what today is the beggining of. Revel in it. I love you. Strap yourself the fuck in because its gonna get tough but its gonna be so fucking worth it.” I cried just writing that, that there gave me a release i didnt even know i needed. To stop and recognise that about myself now is so amazing.

Lets get back to my journey…I get side SO tracked easily…I wont bore you with a years worth of details of how the course went but all I can say is it sparked such an interest in the human body and how it works for me. There was a reason why I chose this course. I have to thank the school for alot that they opened up in me, or gave me the tools to open up in myself throughout that year and also extend the thank you to the other 11 people on that course with me. We all held each other and shared so much about ourselves on that course that it was a beautiful experience that I will be forever thankful of. Upon recieving my certification one year later I knew it wasnt goign to end there. The school provided courses in Myofacial release therapy for Trauma and Somatic Trauma Therapy, I wanted to do them all. But my own healing needed tending to and also the dreaded Covid got in the way of the plans. Covid itself is a trigger for alot of people and was horrific,. People had very different experiences but what I will say as a collective we went through a very traumatic experience and then were thrown back into life without any support and the signs still show in people to this day. You just need to look at the waitlist for the NHS mental health help if you need the evidence. I was a hairdresser/at the beginning of my massage career during this time. As we came out of covid I needed to focus on hair as it was where I was busy. I quickly decided employment wasnt for me and went out on my own as a self employed hairdresser. I worked in a few salons and they done what they needed to at the time but I felt something was missing. I wanted a space to work in that was an experience. That was holistically driven and inclusive. I wanted a space where people could come and a hair experience would be so much more than a haircut. It would be a safe space for the people of the community I was brought up in and all my friends were a part of. It would be a space where we would cover all hair textures and people wouldnt feel judged walking throught the doors as their authentic selves. So ‘folk’ was born, I opened it in Feb 2023. I decorated in orange, unknowingly to me the colour of community and creativity. I merged my massage and hair skills together. If anyone has ever been to a hair salon that is inviting, calm and the intention in the space is to let go then you’ll know what i mean when I say the jump from Hairstylist to Therapist came naturally. What did became apparent to me quickly, and over my career as a hairstylist it had always been a thought, that hairdressers should be trained in mental health first aid. People naturally offload to us, We are up there with most trusted professions to talk to and that includes doctors on that list! But why is that? Why do people tell us things? I believe its a mix of touch, connection without closeness and we are real, we wont judge you, we are on your level…This also is a class thing but again a chat for another time. What we arent qualified to do though is guide people through these offloads, we are thrown on the floor as young stylists without the knowlegde to protect our clients mental health and ours. So i took it upon myself to do a Mental health first aid course. This also reminded me, I wanted to do that Somatic TraumaTherapy course at SHT…where was Simonettas number again? I emailed her. She called me the same day.

The call went something like this, OMG YOU NEED TO COME ON THE STT COURSE I REALLY WANT YOU THERE HOW EXCITING! I had sent the email enquiring about the start date in the August, I had only just opened the salon in the Feb, it was July. Could I really run a business and embark on a year long course with intense personal somatic therapy and 50 case studys…aye sure Jan why not! I will say this, I am so thankful that in that year of opening I had my best friend of 20 years fly back from Aus for family reasons, work beside me and support me while i done the course alongside running the business and a 3 month booked column of hair clients because fuck me at some points I was at breaking point. I couldnt have managed without them. I chose to go on the Somatic Trauma Therapy course, as I said in the first intro to everyone on thie course and to Simonettas dismay… “I wanted a years worth of therapy and this was cheaper than paying a therapist” I was joking of course, only a bit ;) Forever here to make groups of people laugh, It’s my go to and I can’t help being funny as fuck. But in reality I did do the course as personal developement. In the massage course, Somatic therapy was always talked about as it it a massive part of simonettas and the other teachers practice. I knew myself I wanted to do the course. This course, as I said previously, is where i learned I was absolutely AT IT when i told myself I was in touch with my body and feelings. Somatic Trauma Therapy opened up to me what it really is to live aligned to your body. It helped me understand and process what emotions are, why we have them and how to process them healthily. As a chronic intellectualiser of my emotions I knew why, how and what I was supposed to be feeling and could explain it logically but STT made me realsie I wasnt feeling and processing them. It took me 4 personal sessions of STT and to actually say out loud before one session on the course with a fellow trainee Therapist that I was ‘bored of myself, This session was gonna be different because I am ready to let myself in’. That session was life changing for me. I now knew what it was to feel. As with all of SHT courses we work loads on each other as trainees and gain hours this way while being supervised, but also the hours you have to put in outside for case studies exceeds any other Somatic course I’ve read into. We work with each other first, to work through our shit, to hold space safely for our clients. After a year of case studies and learning I gained my qualification and I knew that this work was to powerful not to practice. The world needs this, I dont mean that in an egotistical way of ohhh im here to heal everyone or feel in anyways i am superior for knowing what this work can do but in the way of how much it helped me and in the way IT IS SO POWERFUL IT NEEDS TO BE OUT THERE.

So here I am. A hairdresser turned Somatic Trauma Therapist. Sometimes, If I am being truthful, I get imposter syndrome. Because who am I, out here without a western medical background to back me up as a therapist? Delving into peoples trauma and helping them regulate their nervous system leading them to live better? But then I catch myself, I remind myself that I have 25 years of one-to-one hours of being with people, real people, listening to them, nurturing them, reading them and I have the skill that even some of the most educated people on this planet dont have…people skils along with empathy. The ability to make someone comfortable in my presence. Emotional intelligence and emotional capacity to listen and to see people as they are without judgement. This year I seen Gabor Mate talk at a Trauma convention at Oxford University and he spoke to a group of medical proffesionals and told them all they need to retrace their steps and everything they knew, the medical institutions are missing something pivitol to healing trauma, it starts with Somatic work and listening to our bodies. It was a bit validation that I needed to hear. I’ve started with the body and I cant wait to see where it takes me.

Nik. Somatic Trauma Therapist.

@learntolivesomatically

Thank you for coming to my tiny ted talk from my bed with my cat by my side. This story was maybe for me, I actually see that it was a bit now, But I hope you enjoyed reading it and it explains a little about me as a therapist. I truly believe that anyone who is holding space for people wether it be yoga, circles, therapy etc should be Trauma informed. We need to start from there. If you are not you are doing your clients an injustice. Especially as body movement can bring up alot, you need to have the tools to hold a safe space for people or it can be retraumatising and you can do more damage, no skipping ahead for the prestige of “bringing releases’ in class. i’ve been to classes where I’ve witnessed people invite attendees to lean into their traumas. If you were trauma informed you would know how dangerous this is and you wouldnt be doing it. Sort yourself out please, doing things by halves and these 8 hour online courses gives the wellness industry the bad rep it sometimes deserves, do better if you really care. Educate yourself for your clients. Stop skipping steps to get there in a hurry. I also believe if you are a therapist/practitioner of any kind you should be doing the therapy yourself. Again thanks for reading and let me know what your thoughts are.